OK, so i've just logged onto the new layout and i gotta say, looking mighty shiny NG!, but at the same time as being pleased with such aesthetic features, i was also astounded to find this in my inbox.

~~~YOU WANNA FUCK WITH ME BITCH IM 14 LIFT 250 POUNDS AND CAN KICK YOUR ASS YOU DON'T FUCK WITH THE BEST I KICK YOUR ASS NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY YOUR 5 YOU HAVE NO LIFE AND CAN'T SAY SHIT YOU KNOW WHY? CUZ YOUR MY BITCH YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT YOU SUCK MY COCK YOU LITTLE WHORE FUCK BAG IT DOESN'T MATTER YOU SUCK MY COCK BITCH YOU LITTLE FUCKSTICK BITCH COMMON YOU WANNA FUCK WITH ME YOUR A DUMBASS YOU LIKE COCK! YOU JUST GOT BITCH SLAPPED HOMOSEXUAL IM SMARTER IN EVERY WAY BECAUSE IM READY FOR COLLEGE AT MY AGE WHICH MEANS YOUR A DUMBASS SO YA KNOW WHAT STFU STFU STFU SUCK MY DICK BITCH
UNEARTH JUST OWNED YOUR ASS~~~

NOW then....where to begin?

First thing's first...if you wanna intimidate someone, you do NOT, not by any means at all, start your message with "i'm 14". Really. I'm so scared...

Secondly, don't assume you can kick my ass. a) you don't know me. b) I am almost certainly quicker than you. c) I got a knife.

Third mistake. BAD GRAMMAR. "YOUR 5". My five what?

#4. Can't you count? 1991 - 2007 = 16...not 5. Dumbass.

As for the rest...Far be it from me to deny someone their sexual pleasures. But at the age of 14, i severely doubt your ability to either: turn me gay; make me believe that you do, in fact, own a penis; get me to suck the aforementioned man sausage.

Final comment...You're better than me? In every way? Then why, oh mighty one, waste your time on such mere mortals as myself?

Get a life you little fuck.